English practice / nostalgia or whatever

Today my mom and I had to leave the house early because she had to be at a volleyball game. It was too soon for me to go directly to my dance academy, so she gave me a ride to a Starbucks that’s relatively near…like twelve long(ish) blocks or so, you know, just to kill a couple minutes while the class started.

I decided it was about time for me to make amends with Starbucks, and forgive them for that whole not-hiring-my-astonishingly-great-coffeemaker-self issue. I still think my problem was that, basically, I’m not able to do math properly anymore.

Soooo yeah, I spent like half an hour in there, drinking an iced moka and reading Tokio Blues for the second time in my life (is just so great!!). There were these two guys all suited up annoyingly close from where I was sitting, talking about business or something and typing in their laptops and speaking on their iphones, constantly distracting me from my reading…I wish I could punch them really hard, just for the hell of it.

After finishing my super refreshing super expensive drink, I put on my headphones, turned on my ipod  and headed to class, walking through the streets I know so well, since I used to live in the neighborhood and, sometimes, take a walk around and get coffee or food or something.

I love walking through those streets. I feel like I know every single establishment, even though I may have visited only like 40 or 50 percent of them. I love and miss all that life, the movement, the people walking and stopping everywhere to get whatever they want to get because you just can find ANYTHING around there.

There’s a hospital, and tons of drugstores and convenience stores and schools…they are small businesses that have been there forever and seem like no one ever buys anything in there, but somehow they’re still alive.

They sell ALL kinds of food and alcohol and coffee and stationery and tools and clothes. EVERYTHING, and everything is so close together and I miss walking around and feel like it's all in there for me to take.

Today was the first time I felt like an outsider in what had been my territory since I was 4. I lived there for fifteen years, and now it’s been a year and two months since I don’t anymore.

Is not that I don’t live comfortably where I am now, but sometimes it bothers me that I can’t seem to go anywhere or do anything without taking the bus or a train or without my mom or sister or someone taking me…I don’t feel as independent as I did back in my old house.
Also, I think I would be misserable if I didn't have to go there every tuesday and thursday for my dancing classes, and look around every once and a while just to see what has become of the special places I know so well, what happens without me watching (I know they don't know who I am, but still).

Someday, when I’m older and rich, I would like to go back to MY neighborhood, where I grew up, where I learned to be a person and come and go as I pleased…of course I wouldn’t live in the same house cause it just got horrible, but maybe an apartment or something. Something close, something familiar, somewhere where I really feel like I belong.